Of course, member will always like to pay as little as possible and receive all there is. Well, it’s not really nice to make a girl get undressed and going straight into the action and actually expect for her to cum in 3 minutes if you can do that…

The world of Video Chat has what we can call “show girls” who do all you want, as fast as you want it for the smallest amount of money possible. These girls get undressed even if you did not ask them to and can insert into themselves a monster dildo even without taking the time to get wet – they’re 24/7 wet, hot and ready to make you cum! They will even try to suck on their own clit, get a whole hand inside their thight ass, rub their pussy and moan for you.

Where does this come from? Most of us know that countries like Russia, Ukraine, Bulgaria, Slovakia, Hungary, Romania, Czech Republic etc – mostly the East European countries are poor. People in here earn very little so it’s understandable when a girl tries to do it all for you in very little time. Some of them (a big part of them, lately) get undressed and display full nudity with sexual matters even in free chat! I don’t really know why they do that, because obviously, men will cum in free-chat and won’t even care for a private anymore.

At the beggining of this business, there were only a few girls and of course, a lot less members. But all of the members were shy and were sometimes waiting for hours to catch a performer in free chat and be able to take her private. He would take her private only after politely asking her if it is possible for them to spend some time together. And only if the girl agreed on it, they would spend that time together.

Now, members don’t care for the girls, look at them as they’d look at hookers, prostitutes or whores and as they go private sometimes for some 0.99$/minute, they ask for the girls to get completely naked in a few seconds (no time to waste!) and do all the action they can do. We put the blame for this phenomenon to the girls from those un-wealthy countries from Eastern Europe that don’t think much, can’t talk much (sometimes you’d think they’re set to say “mmmm, im horny bb, get me” or “pvt bb, im horny bb” or “play with me bb” or “for more go pvt” etc) and only wanna make the big bucks.

And they can’t understand that because they went so low as for accepting to get payed some 25 cents per minute, now the whole market went crazy and those who could really do something and be good at this job, well, those have the most to lose because they have to get payed just as low and disrespect themselves just because others done it before them and now it’s either that they play as the “song” asks them to, either they lose it all.

The private time should’ve remained just as caviar – only a few models accepted that should’ve known a perfect english and at least one more international language and that know how to respect themselves, treat themselves like true ladies and accept only patient sweet members around.

I love watching people in the bus…

Right now I’m on a break and don’t work online anymore. I have to take care of some projects for my masters program which I’ll finish this summer and make some work papers for some colleagues that are smaller than me. Well, it’s not that I fully enjoy doing this, but it brings me some money, that I don’t do by showing off, but by using my brain.

Being online is sometimes difficult. You gotta have a pretty much joyful and accepting personality to be able to handle all that’s going on in your own free-chat. Members are demanding, because they know that in the end, you depend on them! And they do not depend on you. They can come and go as they wish. But being a model with brains, well, that’s sometimes just too hard to handle for them. Most are simple men, not very educated and rude too. Many can’t even say anything else than “show ass, pussy, clit, show milk, show lactat, show bootie” etc etc etc. And they expect you to act like a toy, just because there are girls that do it all in free-chat for a 1$ tip and don’t really think much or have any kind of respect for themselves. But that’s understandable, this job can be degrading if you can’t handle yourself and especially your member friends.

And I was asking myself… who is behind that screen? Faces change, some you never get to see or know for real – from the distance, because as for real life, well, that might never ever happen anyway. Maybe some pretend to be stupid, but some really are so. And others just went nuts and now see no other way than to spend their fortunes on this kind of websites. As a performer, I had a vast experience with difference kinds of men. Some of them who were mentally sick indeed!

One of them confessed he can’t talk in free-chat, because he is afraid of crowds and doesn’t even like thanks giving dinner since it gathers everyone together. He told me that his psychologist told him he will never recover, and that this is due to a sad childhood. You know, it kinda amazed me, since he was afraid to get out of the house and he confessed he also isolated himself from the society on this basis. My question is: this kind of person, how does she earn her living and have enough to spend on this kind of website at least for 2-3 hours a week?… And still seem normal for the rest of the time…

Another man told me that he wanted me to stuck a chair’s leg into my… you know. I guess that says it all for most. But there’s more! After that, he wanted me to commit suicide or at least cut myself all over. Now isn’t that sick? How can we girls not go insane there under these conditions?…

I kept the best example for the last part… There was this one great member that came into my private one night… He only wanted to talk to me and kept telling me that he bought this time for me and to make me feel special and that he had not met somebody as special as myself ever since. He showed me his webcam at some point, when I decided he looked exactly like Santa Clause. The guy was 57, had a 14 yo girl and his wife had left him. Now he was searching for a mom for his girl. He had just had a second heart surgery, which he’d carefully hide from my eyes…

Second time he went private with me on the same night, he felt like having some fun and after one hour I slowly took my shirt off… The guy was pretty much happy about me and he wanted to see me as much as possible. He even gave me his daughter’s e-mail address and “she” wrote me. I figured there was something wrong since they wrote in the same manner and because of him telling me she was jealous of me because I had had all of her father’s attention, but at the same time she’d write me mails telling me she loved me.

After one week, he kept complaining about huge chest pains caused by the surgery… So one day, as he was feeling like this, he kept on asking me to get naked for him and play together. At some point I said to myself: “Why not!”, but I was worried he’d harm himself, as I felt he didn’t have much strenght… First thing next morning I find an e-mail from his daughter telling me her dad was in the hospital, in huge pain with high fever and unstable. I was so scared and felt so guilty… I couldn’t sleep for 3 nights in a row… After that, I accidentally checked the Top Members Awards on the website… And there he was on the 3rd place, even though this was a new week and he was in the hospital, supposingly not having access to the internet. I asked him what that was all about and he simply said: “A friend of mine has the password to my account and he goes online as me”. Well, isn’t that bullshit! BULL-SHIT! Come on, I mean… 1 day before he had sent a friend of his in my free chat to tell me where he was and what happened to him and this friend of his tells me he doesn’t even want to be on the website, he just sends along his friends’ message. And the next day he tells me it was this same friend who had the password to his account and that came over to tell me this stuff. Plus! I don’t believe somebody is as stupid as for letting a friend spend all of the money he has on his card or give access to his personal info on his credit card, d’oh! But members do sometimes believe that it’s impossible for models to think.

So there I was blaming myself for the death of Santa Clause. When in fact he was spending his time chatting to his new crushes. Well, it’s not jealousy, let me make this clear. It’s just the fact I hate lies and liars and people who say something but think 100% otherwise and also believe they can fool around with others’ minds and feelings and try to buy their affection and compassion. So it’s not always about the money, guys. Some performers care about their mental estate more. Because I practically asked this member to go to hell and never talk to me again even though he was always on number one in the awards… So how do people go nuts? I believe this one went nuts when his wife left him.

As for me watching people in the bus… well… There was this young couple right in front of my face and on the chair that was in front of me, there was another young man, a bit fat, but that seemed normal. The girl in the young couple could’ve been an actress, she had a very beautiful face, expressing so much tenderness and love… So I was so busy analyzing her that for a while I did not even get to see that the guy on the seat right in front of me was looking at himself in the mirror and talking to himself on a low voice. He was smiling and even tapped his own hand on the window… Why did he go nuts? Was it because he was too lonely for most of his life? Lack of confidence?… Being isolated from the others because he was fat as a kid and his colleagues would make fun of him?… I just don’t get it! Why are there so many sad people on this planet?…

There are a few things that are generally true once you go online:

1. A performer will never be friends with another performer.

2. Members will most likely not know each other (if it’s not that they made an account talking about it from before and they’re friends from real life) and will sometimes feel jealous of one another because of having to split a girl’s attention.

Why say girls will never be friends?…

Well, first, on a small website it’s a common thing that if there are about maximum 100 girls online at a time, girls know all of the members and members know most of the popular girls. Besides, girls watch each other from the distance and learn from one another, steal ideas and try to be the same as a model of theirs on the website.

So, they will start to envy each other and while watching another girl’s chatroom and seeing their “faithful” costumer with another girl…. now ahhhhh! That’s a crime. They will most likely go and hunt the member down, asking him why he had gone visiting another girl. They’ll act just like a cheated wife, not realizing men are there because they can have all the diversity they want there without being questioned, like they are by their wives or girlfriends. And that’s the moment when they start not to like each other anymore either.

On such a small website (more than on a bigger websites where it’s hard to know everybody), sometimes girls even make member accounts, so that they can keep track of what girls in their own country do and who they talk with. Plus that helps them act like regular members, ask questions, check for anothers performers reactions. Because yes, they can ban a country, but the paying members from that country will still be able to see them.

So jealousy would be a first in girls not being able to remain friends. Second would be the fact they can’t really talk too much between themselves, since most work on many sites at the same time and sometimes somebody else writes for them since they don’t talk english.

A third, would be the fact that sometimes, to make traffic run up, the management of the website decides to make a contest for the performers. They win a significant prize – such as 200$ first place, 150$ second place, 120$, 100$, 90$, 80$ etc. I’ll give a concrete example…

From time to time, let’s say once in every three weeks, there’s a thematic contest at NeedLive. For example, now it’s the “Who has the most beautiful pearls neclace?” and 2 or 3 weeks ago it was the “Most beautiful Halloween costume” contest. Girls can have members give them positive votes or negative votes – 1 vote in every 24 hours. So what happens? One performer’s faithful members will go and rate down another girl, who seems to compete with the favorite for the first, second or whatever else place another one wants to get from the girl who has it at that moment. So there’s rumors. Members come and tell girls: “Performer Y told be to come rate you down, but I would never do that” etc. Then girls would watch and hunt each other down, give each other negative votes from the member accounts they created for themselves… And it all turns out as a hunt down to being rich and wealthy and wanting it aaaalll to yourself! And that’s how you miss the fun of the game and maybe don’t even feel like working for the time until the contest is over. Plus! The votes are never given for the theme of the contest, they’re give just for the fact a member likes a certain performer.

So, to conclude: girls won’t be able to be friends there because they like money too much and they’d give any kind of friendship up just to be able to get the extra cash in a contest or to keep their faithful members to themselves. Basically, because they want to be on top of the top too much. So girls will most likely enjoy the cat fight more than  the team spirit that is not compatible to sports that have only one winner at a time

Performer X

Hello!

My name is PerformerX, an unusual kind of performer – because I can speak a perfect English, perfect French and some Spanish, my own language and body language I am 23 years old (even though you will all know I’m 20 if you ever meet me online), I have long brown to blond natural hair, brown eyes, I sometimes wear glasses, but when online contact lenses. I am slim and my special members tell me I have a great smile, beautiful eyes and besides that killer ass, legs, tits and pussy.

I had to have this blog, because I bet no other performer has made such a thing and I believe it is necessary for people to really know what girls think of this “job” (if I can call it that)…

I know that there are many men all over the world that visit video chat websites. Some of these guys are there just for the fun of it, others are there to find a wife, others to make friends. But I guess nobody really plans on falling in love. Most are lonely people, who need affection and search for it online.

I was thinking about having this blog to… put it all out! Tell the world about my experience being on different video chat websites and make some of those guys that make accounts on video chat websites realize what’s on our minds. No performer will ever be able to tell it to your face, because you’d probably run away and search for another girls – who knows more about pretty lies.

I am having this blog to be able to be honest to the world, for none of my friends or family or members know all about me. Every single one knows pieces of me, but not the entire “me”. And I need to do this for myself. At least know that somehow I don’t keep all these things to myself and the world knows. I don’t wanna die like a stranger to the world, no!

Yes, It’s unfair, but we need to lie to you. And you want us to tell you lies and make promises… Admit it

This will be more like a book, so stay posted… I have sooo many things to share…

PerformerX

P.S.: I am not sure you’ll ever get to see me for real, but on the beggining of my post, there’s a photo of my eye You’ll get some more that are not explicit.